Building a Foundation of Hope, One Breath at a Time

I’ve only been in my house a few years and I admit—I’ve been hit hard with worries about it. Since I bought it, I’ve discovered a lot of problems. It seems there are serious issues with the foundation. I’m asking myself: Is it better to fix it or tear it down and start over?

As I wrestle with this, I am reading about the importance of hope. Emily Dickinson writes: “Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops at all.”

Hope, when we can locate it on its perch, may never stop calling to us, but its opposite, hopelessness, is like a predator waiting in the wings. Hopelessness is a spiritual disease. It leads to despair and disconnection. 

Hopelessness leads me to thoughts like: Nobody told me how bad these house issues were. I feel betrayed. I trusted so many people. Who is protecting me? 

As I write this, I begin thinking about my mother. I feel her energy in my heart. Suddenly a mourning dove appears outside my window. It doesn’t move. We stare at each other for what seems forever. It’s probably five minutes. The connection I feel with my mother's energy expands to include a heart to heart connection with this bird. 

I have been in fight-or-flight mode, but the bird remains still and grounded. 

When I look up the symbolism of a dove, I see this message: Let go of the past. Trust. Don’t let the world shackle you and imprison you. Remember you are free. 

I return to my breath. I know that I can never be truly hopeless when I’m connected to my breath, the ultimate connection. This is where clarity begins. This is how hope survives. 

Our culture bombards us with messages that we are broken. Unfixable. That we have nothing to offer. We get scared and project these fears onto things around us. We believe that relationships, old wounds, broken dreams, and society itself, are beyond help. We live in a world where it’s easier to throw things out and move on to something newer, shinier, better. 

Even when I’m confused and indecisive, my breath practice keeps me connected, to myself, to my higher self, to the part of me that knows it will be ok. No matter what I have to do, it will be fine. 

Is it better to fix it or tear it down and start over?

I feel my body is aligned with this house, as if there is an energetic connection between the foundation and the pelvis. When I tune into my body, I think Gosh, my hip is killing me. Do I need a hip replacement? My body mirrors the house. As within, so without. 

Healing (or fixing something) is always about transforming energy. Sometimes that means that an area needs more attention, and sometimes it does mean it’s time to let go completely. 

Is it better to fix it or tear it down and start over?

The answer will only come when I reconnect with my higher vision, my passion, my purpose. 

When I stay grounded and aligned, I’m open to the gift of knowing that I’m safe. I’m always connected. And It’s my choice to stay with my breath, my body, my power. 

My inner voice keeps hearing the word “abundance.” I still feel the spirit of the house. I want to care for it and love it. My vision is still to turn it into a healing center where I can hold drum circles and breathwork retreats. 

Author Anne Lamott said, “My mind is a bad neighborhood that I try not to go into alone.” So I ask the universe for support. 

How can I energetically ….

Stay out of fear?

Stay in trust?

What can I breathe into more deeply?

What’s hiding behind my resistance?

I don’t know what will happen and whether my vision for my home will unfold the way I hope. I can only surrender to my breath and to my own wisdom. I can only listen carefully as my soul sings the tune without the words. I can only hope—and trust—in a perfect outcome.